Trans Language in Mainstream: The Cost of Cultural Capital

Jessica Davis · 2026-10-12

When you hear someone say "spill the tea" or "it's giving," you probably don't think about the Black and Latino queer and ballroom communities where those phrases were born. But Princess Jezebel does. She's a London-based dominatrix and activist who's calling out the mainstream's habit of borrowing trans language while still treating trans people like outsiders. ### The Contradiction We All See Terms like "serving," "clocking the tea," "cunty," "doll," and "diva" have become part of everyday internet slang. For Jezebel, that's a double-edged sword. "Language shaped within Black and Latino queer, drag and ballroom communities, with trans women central to that culture, is now routinely used for cultural capital by a mainstream that has historically portrayed trans people as dangerous, deviant or disposable," she says. She remembers watching *The Silence of the Lambs* at age 12 and seeing Buffalo Bill—a character whose gender transition was framed as monstrous. "I grew up in a media culture that taught audiences to fear people like me," she recalls. "And now I live in a world where that same culture hijacks our language for cultural capital. There's an extraordinary contradiction in celebrating what trans people create while continuing to demonise trans people themselves." ### Madonna's Vogue: A Pattern That Persists Jezebel points to Madonna's 1990 hit "Vogue" as a prime example. The song brought ballroom culture to the masses, but the communities that created it—predominantly Black and Latino LGBTQ+ people—remained marginalized. "It's a pattern that continues today," she argues. "Trans and queer culture can be adopted, repackaged, and commercialised without adequately centring the creators and originators." > "There is an extraordinary contradiction in celebrating what trans people create while continuing to demonise trans people themselves." — Princess Jezebel ### Why This Matters Beyond Words This isn't just about language. It's about who gets to profit from culture and who gets left behind. When mainstream brands and influencers use trans slang, they often do so without acknowledging its roots—or supporting the communities that created it. That erasure makes it easier for society to ignore ongoing discrimination against trans people. Jezebel, who founded a community for trans and non-binary BDSM professionals across the UK and Ireland, sees this firsthand. She believes that acknowledging the origins of this language is a step toward respecting trans lives. "We need to celebrate the creators, not just the creations," she says. ### What Can You Do? - **Educate yourself:** Learn about the history of terms like "spill the tea" and "serving." They come from ballroom culture, not just internet memes. - **Give credit:** When you use these phrases, remember where they came from. A simple acknowledgment can go a long way. - **Support trans creators:** Follow and amplify trans voices in media, fashion, and entertainment. - **Speak up:** If you see someone using trans language while disrespecting trans people, call it out. Language is powerful. It can build bridges or reinforce walls. By honoring the origins of queer and trans slang, we can help ensure that the communities who created it aren't left in the shadows. *This article is based on an interview with Princess Jezebel, a professional dominatrix and founder of a community for trans and non-binary BDSM professionals. You can find her online.*