The Question Adult Retailers Aren't Asking—But Should Be

William Moore · 2026-10-07

Every customer who walks into an adult store brings a different body, comfort level, and set of needs. Retail staff already know how to ask the basics: Do you prefer vibration or suction? Are you using water-based or silicone lubricant? Do you have a latex allergy? What size are you comfortable with? But here's the thing—those questions only scratch the surface. They assume a certain kind of customer. One who can easily communicate their needs, who isn't managing chronic pain, who doesn't have a disability that affects how they use a product. The reality? That's not everyone. And if retailers want to serve their full community, they need to dig deeper. ### Why the Basics Aren't Enough Think about it. A customer with arthritis might struggle with small buttons or stiff controls. Someone with limited hand mobility might need a toy that's easy to grip or has a loop handle. A person with a chronic illness like fibromyalgia might find vibration too intense on a flare-up day. These aren't niche concerns—they're everyday realities for millions of people. Yet most adult retail training doesn't cover them. Staff learn about materials, speeds, and sizes, but rarely about accessibility. That's a gap that leaves customers feeling unseen and underserved. ### What Better Training Looks Like So what would change? For starters, retailers could train staff to ask different questions: - Do you have any mobility or dexterity concerns that affect how you use a product? - Are there certain sensations—like intense vibration or pressure—that you need to avoid? - Would a lighter weight or a different shape make things more comfortable? - Do you need something that's easy to clean or operate with one hand? These questions open the door to real conversations. They signal that the store is a safe space for all bodies, not just the ones that fit a narrow ideal. ### The Business Case for Inclusion Let's be clear: this isn't just about being kind. It's also smart business. People with disabilities and chronic health conditions make up a huge market—over 1 in 4 adults in the United States live with a disability, according to the CDC. That's tens of millions of potential customers. If your store doesn't welcome them, they'll go somewhere else. Or worse, they'll give up entirely. > "Inclusion isn't a favor you do for a marginalized group. It's a way to make your business better for everyone." — Anonymous retail consultant When you train staff to be thoughtful about accessibility, you're not just helping one customer. You're creating a culture of empathy that benefits everyone—the shy first-timer, the older adult exploring new things, the person recovering from surgery. Everyone has unique needs at some point. ### Small Changes, Big Impact You don't need a complete overhaul. Start small. Add a section to your staff handbook about disability etiquette. Bring in a guest speaker from the local disability community. Rethink your product descriptions to include details like weight, button size, and grip options. These tweaks cost little but mean a lot. And remember, training isn't a one-time thing. It's ongoing. The more you learn, the better you serve. So next time you're reviewing your training materials, ask yourself: Are we really asking the right questions? If not, it's time to start.